"life is not about the number of breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away."

i swear to god, if i hear this quote used one more time, i am going to pee on someone. or something vulgar. i don't know.

there is one girl that i hate more than anyone.
it used to be through no fault of her own, but i'm positive now that she thinks it's funny to upset me.
she pretends to be so nice and faultless...and i just want to scream it in his face, because he doesn't see.

at least i'm a mean person and i admit it.

this...is probably the most unconventional love i have ever experienced. and, i think it's important, but not necessarily good. i want him forever in every way, and it's so pathetic that i just can't stand it.

i cannot stand how my daily life choices must be judged and commentated by my parents. i'm not talking about important things, like my health or safety. i'm talking about how late i decide to stay up, for example, or if i choose to have a diet soda with dinner. i am eighteen years old and have been self-sufficient since fourteen.

please, i beg of you, cut me a break.

i am seriously considering becoming an ole miss rebel.
i don't know, though. but i do know that i'm sick of my elitist, overbearing private schools. i think that thirteen years of them is quite sufficient.
my dad still doesn't want me to go.

it's at times such as this...3am, waiting in the dark...that i need to be something other than his girl toy. (the female version of boy toy) as much as i love it, i can't just be happy and cuddly and beautiful and careless all the time. i need to talk to someone. i need someone to actually ask me how i am. it's...getting to the point of degradation, but i'm afraid to opt out.

but...it's nothing. i don't know. i used to be so excited for what we would one day surely be. i'll go away now.

damn. damn damn damn, girl. you can't tell here, but this thayer zoiros dress looked SO fly. i wore it to a formal event last night, and the bcbg heels, big hair, and lack of jewelry complemented it. i think i'm going to take more pictures of it. live fast, die young, i want to be a professional socialite.